Slippery thief makes off with 18 tons of Crisco

He must love french fries or something, but one slippery thief made of with 18 tons of Crisco, Florida cops said.
St. Petersburgh police said that the oily robber snatched the tractor trailer containing the vegetable oil that can be used for frying or making baked good.
It had been destined for a distribution center before the crook made off with it, investigators said.
Quite what they intend to do with the 36,000 pounds of oil remains to be seen.

BOY, 10, NABS THIEVES GUN AND MAKES 'EM RUN

THIS is the moment a quick thinking 10-year-old foiled two armed robbers by firing their own gun after one of them dropped it, cops say.

BK BANDITS BUSTED. EMPLOYEE STOLE GETAWAY CAR

FOILED

A DASTARDLY pair of ham-burglars were left in a pickle, when a restaurant employee foiled their attempted robbery by sneaking out the back and taking their getaway car. 

Cops were easily able to ketchup with the pair, who ran into the Burger King in Stockton, CA brandashing guns and demanding cash. 

But as the two men were inside robbing the restaurant, another cashier snuck out the back where he noticed the suspects getaway car with the engine still running. 

Driving it away, he hid it round the corner and called the cops. 

Officers told CBS Sacramento that suspects Gabriel Gonzalez and Jeremy Lovitt panicked when they ran out and couldn't find the vehicle and ran into a nearby field. 

CRAIGSLIST KILLER IS BROGAN RAFFERTY, 16: COPS

BEASLEY

16-YEAR'S OLD

THE TWISTED killer who murdered one man and shot another after they replied to Craigslist ad for a job is just 16-years old cops say.
Brogan Rafferty allegedly helped his pal Richard Beasley, 52, lure the men with the promise of work to a remote Ohio cattle farm.
But as we reported here, the unfortunate duo walked into an ambush.
One of their bodies was found in shallow grave by a cadaver dog, but a second man managed to escape even though he was shot.

NO DOUGH THIS TIME FOR DUNKIN DONUT BANDITS

DONUT LOVERS

THERE better not be a hole in their story and if they better have hidden dough well.
Because cops are claiming that they've busted the Dunkin Donut bandits, who robbed more than 30 stores in the Boston area since May.
Cops caught up with brother's Peter and Wayne Wallace, 35 and 33, after a high speed car chase, when they responded to a break in at a store in Canton, MA.
And now they're alleging that the that the dastardly duo are behind at least 30 more robberies.
Refusing to sugar coat things, Chief Kenneth Berkowitz told WBZ: "Since the beginning of the year, they've hit Dunkin' Donuts, breaking in early morning, late at night, prying through drive-thru windows or back doors."

GUMBY THIEF CHARGED WITH BURGLARY

REMEMBER when Gumby tried to rob the 7-ELEVEN, but failed because he couldn't get his gun out of his costume. Video footage here.   
Well now he's been charged with burglary - or at least Jacob Kiss, 19, the idiot who wore the costume has. 
His pal Jason Giramma, also 19, who didn't even have the gumption to don a disguise has also been charged. 
They were such bad thieves that when the costumed clown walked into the San Diego convenience store and demanded cash, the clerk thought it was a joke and ignored the life sized Claymation character, he carried on cleaning up.   

SAFE CRACKING 'SUBWAY BANDIT' SOUGHT BY COPS

BANDIT

HE DOESN'T care about the type of bread, meat or salad because the so called 'Subway Bandit' is only after one thing - cold hard cash.
Cops say the crafty crook has repeatedly eluded detection while breaking into at least 24 North Texas Subway restaurants, including two last month on consecutive nights.
Bedford police Lt. Kirk Roberts, whose city has been hit four times since April told the Star Telegram:
"He's a real professional.”

MOSS MAN GREGORY LIASCO GOES INTO HIDING AGAIN

MOSS MAN

A MYSTERIOUS museum thief dubbed 'Moss Man' because of his full body camouflage suit has gone into hiding and failed to show up at court. 
Gregory Liasco, 36, was busted outside Portland's Rice Northwest Museum of Rocks and Minerals, where he'd cut a hole in the outer wall and was trying to break in. 
His disguise was so good that officers initially wondered why a police dog was biting the ground before they realised it was Liasco in his suit, looking like a mound of moss. 
It's thought he may have been after some of the precious stones held in the museum, but he claimed the whole thing was a mix up and it was a Halloween costume that his kids had given him. 
But if his in costume again, he might be hard for officers to find again, as a warrant has been issued for his arrest, as he failed to show up for trial. 
Although of course, he could have been there all along, but blending into his surroundings. 

DUMB CROOKS 1. THIEVES CALL 911 ON THE JOB

SHAME FACED

CALL it bad luck or should that be call in bad luck.
Either way Nikia Goode, Vernon Bundy or Johnny Taylor must have been stunned when the cops turned up, just moments after they sat there plotting to steal scrap metal.
What they couldn't have known is that one of them had led officers right to them by accidentally dialing 911, when they sat on their phone. 

FULL TILT POKER WAS 'A GLOBAL PONZI SCHEME'

FERGUSON

AN online poker company, formed and run by former card sharks was nothing more than "a giant ponzi scheme" federal investigators have claimed. 
Full Tilt Poker, formed by among others, world champion players Howard Lederer and Christopher Ferguson stand accused of "picking the pockets of loyal customers."
According to investigators, the company only had $60 million of the $390 million it owed its players in March and over the years they had allegedly used $444million of player funds to pay board members and other owners.  

REAL LIFE RAMBO RUSSELL C. MARCUM ON THE LOOSE

'SUICIDAL'

A MASSIVE manhunt is underway for a solider described as 'dangerous and suicidal' who has escaped from military custody. 
Russell C. Marcum had been facing burglary charges when he fled Fort Drum, CO in as stolen car, leading cops on a chase over three counties, before they were able to use stop sticks to puncture the tires.
Armed with a handgun, wearing camouflage and a bulletproof vest the first class private fled into a wooded area and disappeared. 
He was reportedly suicidal and said that he would force police to shoot him in order to end his life, but despite a huge manhunt using dogs and helicopters he has still not been found. 
Fort Drum spokeswoman Julie Cupernall said Marcum had been under 'unit custody' in the barracks on a charge of third-degree burglary after being accused of stealing a $700 plasma TV from a storage unit.

FIRST IT WAS GUMBY NOW SPONGEBOB'S IN TROUBLE

HONESTLY!!! What is it with costume clad douchebags having run in's with the law. As we reported yesterday the dumb Gumby, who tried and failed to rob a convenience store has now handed himself in. But now Spongebob has left his pineapple under the sea to pick a fight with two women on Hollywood Boulevard, as you can see here. 

It's thought he might be posing as the character to in the hope that tourists will tip him, but the pink haired women were clearly unimpressed with his yellow costume.

GUMBY GIVES UP BUT CLAIMS IT WAS ALL A MISTAKE

ROBBER?

REMEMBER when Gumby tried to rob the 7-ELEVEN, but failed because he couldn't get his gun out of his costume. Video footage here.    
Well anyway, he's now decided to surrender and he's even handed in his disguise. 
The bungling Gumby is actually Jacob Kiss, 19, and his pal, who didn't even bother to disguise himself is Jason Giramma, also 19. 
They were such bad thieves that when the costumed clown walked into the San Diego convenience store and demanded cash, the clerk thought it was a joke.
Ignoring the life sized Claymation character, he carried on cleaning up.   Annoyed at being shunned the furry green bandit told him: "You don't think this is a robbery? I have a gun."

COCK SPENCER DANGER CULLEN STOLE FOR NEW PENIS

COCK

SHE really is a cock.
Spencer Danger is my middle name Cullen,  got caught stealing from the Walmart where she works in the hope of funding a full sex change of operation.
Lets just say, it'll be a while before she has one if she relies on her criminal abilities to pay for it.
Together with pal Adriano Valdes Altiveros III, who just wanted a car with his share,  the wannabe male planned her heist at the Prescott, AZ for days. 
But their plan was far from ingenious.

Lieutenant Andy Reinhardt told The Daily Courier: "Through investigation and surveillance video, detectives determined that a key was used to enter a locked cash office where $45,000 in cash had been removed.

KILLER BUSTED FOR ALYSSA OTREMBA, 15, RAPE, MURDER

BRUTAL

A TWISTED killer plucked a teenage girl from the street as she was walking home, brutally stabbed her to death and then burned her body in a vacant lot in North Las Vegas.
Alyssa Otremba, 15, had texted her family to say she would be home within half-an-hour, just arfter 6:30 on Friday evening.
But she never made it.
The next day family and friends found Alyssa's scorched body in a vacant lot on the edge of town, on the route she would have taken home.
She had been stabbed around 40 times before being set on fire, according to the Clark County Coroner's Office.
The following Monday cops got a tip from Elizabeth Morales, 18, who claimed her boyfriend, 19-year-old Daniel Ortiz may know something about the brutal murder.

GUMBY TRIED TO ROB 7-ELEVEN: FAILED

CHECK out this idiot, who thought it would be a good idea to rob a 7-Eleven dressed as Gumby.

Walking up to the clerk the costume clad crook said: "This is a robbery."

RONNI CHASEN SHOT WITH COP'S STOLEN GUN

SUPERSTAR Hollywood Publicist was Ronni Chasen was murdered with a gun stolen from a cop, reports say. The beloved Tinseltown PR woman was driving through Beverly Hills in her Mercedes-Benz after the premier of the movie "Burlesque" when ex-con and career criminal Harold Martin Smith tried to rob her. What happened next is unclear, but by the end of the exchange Chasen's body had been pumped with seven bullets.
Now it's emerged those bullets came from a gun stolen from a cop, although officers remained tight lipped as to the officer involved.    
Martin Smith then used the gun to commit suicide before cops could question him about the fatal shooting. 
Police Chief David Snowden told The Hollywood Reporter: "That man is the man

4 DEAD IN MASSACRE AT LONG ISLAND PHARMACY

FATHER'S DAY turned into a bloodbath at a Long Island pharmacy Sunday leaving four people dead. Cops say the botched heist happened at Haven Drugs in Medford, New York around 10 a.m. That's when a man entered the family-owned business wearing a baseball cap, sunglasses and brandishing a handgun. The stone-cold killer then executed the four people in the store at the time and fled on foot with prescription pills.
Suffolk County cops say two of the victims, Raymond Ferguson, 45, and Jennifer Mejia, 17, of East Patchogue (who was going to graduate from high school next week) worked at the drug store.

JUDGE GEORGE ASSAD'S SON GUILTY OF BELLAGIO HEIST

THE HEIST

ASSAD

OCEAN'S 11 it most certainly wasn't.
Instead Anthony Michael Carleo, the son of high profile former Las Vegas judge, George Assad used a classic stick up technique in the infamous Bellagio Hotel.   Back in November lawmen were left astonished by the thief's nerves of steel as
he walked up to the craps table in one of the most heavily guarded casino's in the World and pulled out a gun, before helping himself to the chips.
He walked out a millionaire. 
At the time Sin City Police commented that the robbery which took around three minutes was: "about as quick as you can do it."

'GRANNY BANDIT' SUSPECT DENIES CALI. HEIST SPREE

"I FOUND THEM"

THE woman accused of being the "Granny Bandit" has denied having any part in the stick ups outside Southern California department stores. Cops say Dodi Wasbotten, 50, is a pensioner put up artist who waited for her victims outside the shops and then pounced when they came out, brandishing a pistol.
She was dubbed the "Granny Bandit" as she was described as an older looking woman who concealed her face with sunglasses and a scarf. Wasbotten, a grandmother with a history of drug and alcohol use, was picked up as her vehicle matched the