STUPID LENNY DYKSTRA PLEADS GUILTY IN DOPEY SCAM

WE THOUGHT WE LOOKED BAD

NAILS has been nailed. Former Mets and Phillies star Lenny 'Stupid Lenny' Dykstra pleaded no contest to three counts of grand theft auto and filing a false financial statement in a harebrained scam he orchestrated. He was released and will be sentenced Jan. 20, 2012 and it could mean up to four years in the big house. In exchange for 48-year-old former all-star's plea, 21 charges against him, including attempted grand theft auto, identity theft, possession of a controlled substance and unauthorized possession of a syringe, will be dismissed at sentencing, according to the statement. What an idiot.
MORE ON STUPID LENNY

LENNY DYKSTRA "EXPOSED HIMSELF" TO PA'S

EXPOSED

BASEBALL legend Lenny Dykstra placed ads on Craigslist for personal assistants and then exposed himself to them when they turned up for interviews, cops say.
At least six women say they arrived at the home of the troubled former All-Star in the hope of landing the lucrative role, to be told that the job also required a massage service.
Then, they say the one time champion outfielder, who led the NY Mets to a World Series, exposed himself to them.
The news will pile more pressure on Dykstra, who could face up to six months in jail and a $1,000 fine for each count, if convicted.
He has already pleaded not guilty in June to five counts of attempted grand theft auto, four counts of identity theft, eight counts of filing false financial statements, three counts of grand theft auto and three counts of possession of a controlled substance.

"NAILS" NAILED: LENNY DYKSTRA BUSTED FOR DRUGS

BASEBALL legend Lenny Dykstra has been busted for drugs and for his role in an elaborate car theft scheme, cops say.
The three time All Star nicknamed "Nails" during his career is accused of being part a three man team who tried to lease high-end cars from dealers this year by providing phony information and claiming credit through a fake business called Home Free Systems. Cops also found cocaine, Ecstasy and the synthetic human growth hormone Somatropin at his San Fernando Valley home.
It's just the latest in a string of brushes with the law for the one time

CRYBABY LENNY DYKSTRA VOWS: 'I WILL WIN BIG!'

STUPID LENNY

STUPID Lenny Dykstra, or should we say Lenny K. Dykstra. We never liked him during his playing days with the Mets and the Phillies. We don't like him now. We think he's a moron. A genuinely stupid guy who believes he has business acumen. Now, the tobacco-juice spewing nimrod is making a plea to the public through the pages of the New York Post re. his current plight. Oh, you haven't heard? Bankrupt, fraud, steroid accusations, bounced checks to hookers and on and on and on and on.
Lenny tells "the people of the great City of New York:
What I have somehow lived through the past 2½ years, and continue to live through now, makes me fully understand that God would never make someone endure what I have endured unless there was a reason for it. That being said, I was wrong when I thought God put me on this earth to