KIM 'PEE ON ME' KARDASHIAN DIVORCES HOOPS HUMP

'I BETTER GET PEED ON OR I'M ACTUALLY GOING TO HAVE TO DO SOMETHING.'

THERE was a time when... if a celebrity got peed on, well, that would just about sink their career. Well, that's all changed. We don't think more people are being peed on (and frankly, we're not being judgmental here.) It just seems bizarre that someone as loathsome and untalented as Kim Kardashian is so phenomenally popular with women who would say, 'ooooooooh, gross' if it was one of their friends being peed on. The point here is, the media whore is getting divorced after just 72 days.

SAMANTHA RONSON NABBED FOR DRUNK DRIVING

LINDSAY LOHAN'S lesbian ex Samantha Ronson was busted Monday for drunk driving during a midday booze-a-ramma. The untalented rich girl with connections DJ, 33, was driving her black Porsche (we weep for her) when she was pulled over in Baker, California, according to TMZ. The aggressively unattractive heiress flopped her field sobriety test and was arrested. She refused a breathalyzer in the field but agreed to one at a nearby cop shop. She blew over the 0.8 limit. The popular celebrity disc jockey (widely considered to be not terribly good but well connected. Brother is uber producer Mark Ronson; step dad is Mick Jones from Foreigner) was returning home from a gig in Las Vegas when she was nailed. She dated former actress Lohan in 2008. The 53-year-old onetime star said she wanted to concentrate on her "career."